Surface and Symbol

The darkness in your heart is overbearing I’ve been a fool to think that you Would go on...

Thu, 20 Sep 2012 00:45:25 -0400

The darkness
in your heart is
overbearing

I’ve been a fool
to think that you
Would go on changing.

I reek of dried blood
And forgiveness.

your mistake

Tue, 14 Aug 2012 18:01:00 -0400

when I say “later”

You assume “never”

kick me out

and have a shout

threw a tantrum

threw your phone, then

cracked your screen and

I hope you’ve learned:

don’t lash out

at things you care about

Wed, 08 Aug 2012 23:30:36 -0400

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Mon, 23 Jul 2012 10:52:34 -0400

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Fri, 20 Jul 2012 17:46:35 -0400

it’s three in the morning and I can’t sleep, so I start looking at all the photos of you...

Mon, 16 Jul 2012 03:16:42 -0400

it’s three in the morning and I can’t sleep, so I start looking at all the photos of you on facebook.

What me?

No, never.

and then.

Wed, 27 Jun 2012 02:05:00 -0400

As my consciousness slowly evaporates, I wish I could somehow remember this glorious nonexistence. But slowly I forget myself, all of myself and remember nothing. Yet in this nothingness, something carnal, something instinctual remembers what its like to be part of the universe again.

Kittens and perogies make lonely nights more bearable.

Fri, 15 Jun 2012 00:09:14 -0400

Kittens and perogies make lonely nights more bearable.

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Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:40:28 -0400

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Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:31:02 -0400

"Well I think all that dieting stuff is stupid, because Sunday I didn’t eat any ice cream and I..."

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:30:46 -0400

“Well I think all that dieting stuff is stupid, because Sunday I didn’t eat any ice cream and I gained 4 pounds, and then yesterday I ate a quart of ice cream and lost a pound.”

- Overheard, a rather-hefty woman on her cellphone as she perused the candy aisle in the grocery store. (via cranquis)

"I wish I’d done everything on Earth with you."

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:17:42 -0400

“I wish I’d done everything on Earth with you.”

- F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (via theunquotables)

"But in reading great literature I become a thousand men and yet remain myself."

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:17:32 -0400

“But in reading great literature I become a thousand men and yet remain myself.”

- C.S. Lewis, An Experiment in Criticism (via larmoyante)

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Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:17:22 -0400

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Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:16:59 -0400

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Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:16:52 -0400

honeyforthehomeless: Truer words have never been spoken....

Sun, 10 Jun 2012 23:16:02 -0400

honeyforthehomeless:

Truer words have never been spoken. Charles Bukowski

intellectualized justifications for douchebaggery.

Thu, 07 Jun 2012 23:30:00 -0400

First, I pretend to be a dick. Not a complete asshole, but the right ratios of passivity v aggressiveness to really get on your nerves. I want you to realize that I’m a douche. I want you to hate me, not because I want to hurt you but because I want you to realize that you’re better off.

However, looking deeper inside I see the darker nature of my actions.

See, it hurts me to treat you like this. Except I’m a bit of a masochist, so in a sick twisted way I’m kind of enjoying it.

On further reflection, I begin to be afraid to admit things to myself. In my subconscious, there are fragments, incomplete thoughts. From these invisibilities I trace that I might want revenge. Revenge for the countless of times I was the reasonable one and you were the angry one. Revenge for the times your negative emotions spilled onto me and threw me off centre. You really got to me. Your petulant and infantile behaviour had me breaking my teeth off trying to bite my lips.

I’m not proud of this. I have voices in my head telling me I’m wrong for doing this, for putting you through such and such. But I just don’t care. It scares me that I can embody such darkness. This isn’t the person I am, but I am this person right now, and I hate it. But I kinda like it.

Because I’ve come to realize that you treat the people closest to you the worst. Your friends love you because you are amazing to them. You reserve your monsters for those who you love. I can only speculate as to why. Feelings of ownership, mixed with extreme comfort around a person. Probably because you think you can get away with it.

But now the final justification for these actions rears its head in my mind. I realize I don’t want you to love me anymore. I don’t want you to treat me like this any longer.

And I really hope we stay friends, because you’re a wonderful person at that distance.

zahra4: Perspective, it’s a fascinating thing. Though if we...

Wed, 06 Jun 2012 23:28:54 -0400

zahra4:

Perspective, it’s a fascinating thing.

Though if we assume she’s from Saudi Arabia she can’t vote, drive, or leave the house without a male escort.

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Wed, 06 Jun 2012 22:21:44 -0400